International Men’s Day 2024: Spreading positivity within the community

International Men’s Day 2024

International Men’s Day celebrates the positive value men bring to their communities and celebrates role models. We spoke to David, Community Engagement Coordinator, about how his own bereavement and passion for helping others led him to his role with us today. 

“I had started training to become a counsellor in 2005, but  I ultimately had to put it on pause due to my existing full-time work and other life commitments. Although unable to continue my training at that time, I utilised the skills and knowledge I had acquired when I started supporting bereaved individuals through volunteering for Cruse Bereavement Support in 2008. The training however was something I decided to pick up again after my wife died in 2016, following her care in our Inpatient Unit. 

“I decided I wanted a change from my work in the corporate world and so I started to pick up my counselling studies again. All my training made me realise that everything I went through was normal and that with time and grief work, things would get better. I went to local support groups, and part of my own therapy was being able to help others there, not only by using my counselling training but also by sharing my own personal experience of grief. Providing that support to other people in the bereavement space helped me to find motivation and aspects of my own identity again, following my bereavement. 

“I believe strongly in instilling in the younger male generation that they should be comfortable in expressing emotions and feelings. So as part of my grief, it was important to me to model “good grief” to my son, by showing vulnerability and being comfortable in expressing the range of feelings and emotions I experienced as part of my grief. 

Because of the support that my family received from Rennie Grove Peace, my son and I have also participated in various fundraising events for Rennie Grove Peace and a personal highlight for me in such activities was raising money by running the Watford Half Marathon.” 

Supporting others struggling with grief

David has since worked as a bereavement support worker and volunteered at our Compassionate Café at Café West.  

“I had been attending the Café West on and off for over 16 years. It was a chance to meet others in the community and provided a social connection. When I started volunteering at the café in 2018, I got a real sense of purpose and was able to use my own experience of grief, and my counselling skills, to support others. I got to know everyone who attended so well and really saw the value of community and talking to each other. Giving up my time to listen to people costs me nothing but can make a huge difference to them. When the Compassionate Café initiative was launched by Rennie Grove Peace, I knew that such a well-established community café could be a participant in the scheme and so, in conjunction with Rennie Grove Peace, I helped it to become a Compassionate Café.” 

David then joined Rennie Grove Peace as the  Community Engagement Coordinator in October this year which sees him connect with community groups and educate people about our services. 

“The role was very attractive for me as a big believer in community and the value of giving back, as well as being able to utilise my own experience and being an advocate of grief awareness and hospice care. It is very meaningful work.”